If you had told me five years ago that I would actually take pleasure in drinking a beverage that requires tapioca balls being shot into the back of my throat each time I take a sip, I would have told you about-face your rooster wagon and ride on back to the Cluck-Cluck House!

But lo and behold, here I am in 2008 and somehow I have come to love the extremely gay drink known as Bubble Tea. I know what you're thinking: "Gay? How can a beverage be gay?" I don't know, maybe it's the HUGE GIRLY NEON-COLORED STRAW or the fact that's it's called BUBBLE TEA (weeee!) that makes me think that I should be wearing an ascot and short shorts while throwing confetti and listening to disco remixes of Judy Garland songs.

I've always considered myself a pretty straight arrow, but now, because of you, Bubble Tea, now I'm not so sure.