about the preparation process I go through before writing each hilarious blog entry. Well, a master chef doesn’t like to give away his secret recipe but, well, ALL RIGHT.

Wake up at 7 a.m.
Soak head in fresh drawn butter.
Run 5 miles.
Sleep for another 3-4 hours.
Exfoliate skin, trying to eliminate acne caused by fresh drawn butter.
Put on pot of coffee.
Remember I hate the taste of coffee.
Think about writing blog.
Finish coffee.
Think more.
Strip down to underwear.
Punch mirror.
Stare at cuts and bruises on knuckles, hoping they form inspirational word or picture.
Fail, put on second coffee pot, writhe in blood.
Stretch!
Ingest poisonous capsule.
Get rushed to emergency room.
Get stomach pumped.
Chat with Gladys, friendly black nurse.
Argue with Gladys about existence of God.*
Make Gladys cry, she storms out.
Flustered, take out laptop and write blog.

That’s all, folks!

*this is only on days when I don’t believe in God.

This entry was posted by Matt, on Friday, August 18, 2006. You can leave your response.